“Same Eyes”
Maz Kanata is a character in the movie Star Wars: The Force Awakens. Maz Kanata told another character, Finn, “If you live long enough, you see the same eyes in different people.”
My career has given me the opportunity to visit thousands of families in their homes. Those experiences reinforced, in my mind and heart, that most of us are the same. We want to have love and trust in our families and we want to find our “place in this world.”
At the core, we all long for the same things. We want love that lasts. We want to be understood and not judged. We want a safe place to call home.
There are those who look at people, on any street, and make judgments about them without having any idea of their past/current pain, their goals and dreams for their lives or why they behave in certain ways.
The quiet pain of someone who’s been betrayed that you’ve seen before, maybe in a friend who never said what hurt them most is seen in the eyes of others.
In April 2025, I began a new venture to help serve more people. It has given me, once again, another way to confirm that most of us want to succeed in some way. The conversations, that I have had to honor to listen in on and those conversations where I participated reinforced the words of Maz Kanata “If you live long enough, you see the same eyes in different people.”
Eyes that carry stories, eyes that have seen too much, or not enough, eyes that ask silently, “Can I trust you?” or “Will you hear me?”
You and I have no idea what is inside someone. You don’t see people until you listen to them. Not halfway listening, while waiting for your turn to talk but really listening with your heart, not just your ears.
If you invest the time to as the late Stephen Covey advised “seek first to understand, and then be understood,” your eyes will be open to people in ways that you could have never imagined.
“If you live long enough, you see the same eyes in different people” and one day your vision changes. You start seeing people—not for their behavior alone, but for their why. You begin recognizing hurt where others only see hardness. You recognize hope hiding behind hesitation. You learn that compassion isn’t just kindness…it’s clarity.
Let Maz Kanata's wisdom be a guiding principle for us. Let us strive to look beyond the surface and recognize the shared humanity in everyone we encounter.
I Believe in YOU!
John W. Carver, LUTCF
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0F3XQKBRC
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"Default Settings: Challenging What You Think You Know" explores the concept of "default settings" in life—deeply ingrained beliefs, habits, and societal norms that shape our thoughts and actions. It emphasizes the importance of questioning these defaults to foster personal growth, innovation, and critical thinking.